The Reinvention I Didn’t Know I Needed

Everything felt wrong. That dramatic statement was like a ghost floating through my mind for months. I couldn’t explain what it meant, what wasn’t right, or when things started to go wrong. It was stealing my time and energy, and I felt its presence everywhere. Then one day, without an opportunity to react, the Universe stepped in to slam the door shut. That was the day my coaching business, New Leaf Wellness, ceased to exist.

Again, I know this sounds terribly dramatic, but it’s the truth. It was September 5th. I went to my weekly networking meeting, a group I’d been a part of for a year and a half. I gave my prepared 60-second commercial, but I didn’t hear the words come out of my mouth. I’m not sure if I even finished the speech. It felt wrong and I remember feeling really numb, body and mind. I drove home, opened my laptop, and sent an email to the people I had just been with telling them I was leaving the group and pausing my business. This all happened very quickly. I was sad for about 5 minutes and then I pulled out my journal to get started on my next step, my reinvention.

I can tell you with certainty that the numbness I felt during that meeting and while driving home was the Universe telling me to sit back and relinquish control. The Universe took the action I was incapable of taking. And, I think the reason I wasn’t in tears or distraught about it was because I was simply relieved.

I knew then and know for certain that my purpose in life is to be a coach. I am growing an audience on social media and I have been meeting the most amazing collaborators at networking events. But in September, I didn’t have the number of clients I thought I should, and it was fueling panic and desperation. Those feelings, along with that ghost in my mind telling me my message was wrong, were throwing my entire life off balance.

I withdrew for a few months. I gave myself permission to process my situation without judging. I let my words come onto paper as they wished without forcing myself to write. I let my presence on social media and at events wane. Lessons floated to the surface slowly, but they were powerful ones. Personally, I learned that I was not nurturing my energy, respecting the process, or giving myself grace (NRG. More on that at a later date). I learned that my desperation to succeed was interfering with my ability to manifest success. Coaching wise, I learned that my message wasn’t wrong, just incomplete. Words and full sentences started to appear, albeit randomly, to refuel my creative fire.

Time has been a friend to me and I feel like I’m back on track now. New Leaf Wellness became Prioritize and Thrive Coaching. Instead of thinking of it as a business, I now see this part of my life as a creative outlet that will attract new clients. In some ways I’ve picked up right where I left off, thanks to the support from some amazing friends. While the path looks similar to the last one, the direction I’m heading and the steps I’m taking feel better somehow. It feels right.

I had let the chaos in my life throw me off-course. I was letting it weigh me down instead of seeing the space it was creating for me. I know now that it was mid-life handing me a gift…the gift of reinvention. It was giving me an opportunity to bravely step back, adapt to the changes, and get onto a path where I could thrive instead of just survive!

Does my story resonate with you? Then you too are ready to reinvent yourself! I’d love to help so let’s talk. Email me at Tracy@PrioritizeAndThrive.com